-i'm.SO.miss-understood. -shikayeproductions.

Sigh....
navigations are the words.
This is my own space to let it out. especially when theres no one to talk to that true understands or try to understand me.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

hihi...

hmmm lets begin today wif a little different...
went for BTT in the morning...
well was rather nervous...
failed the trail test...
but manage to pass the actucl...
then while applying for PDL i nearly failed the eye test...
eye sight been abd lately...
oh well after that went back to sch...

that about all for today...

well once again late at nite still awake...
well not that i wanna kill myself by staying up all day and night...
but juz i dunno everytime i lie down... i juz wonder too many things i cant get to slp...
well recently been really crazy, minds been screwed up lately...
i guess its like that most of the time bahx...
it'll return to normal de again...

well been psycho ing myself to well change myself...
hmmm lets juz say i'm lost dunno who i am anymore...
but hmm i'll find it abck one day...
shift forcus into other things...
then things shld start to improve...
wahh stress is building up...
alot of major lab test and papers coming up...
i seriously dunno if i can handle them....
well used to be damn ignorant'
as in i believe i was meant to do great things ad everything i do will always turn out well...
well when smack wif the facts of real life...
things is juz different...
persoanlly i'm rather sick of myself...
that i dun care anymore le bahx...
wads important is those around me... and the things i do...
if i wanna do sumtin make sure its the best out there...
if i'm a fren of someone make sure i'm a true fren whos always there for them...
well life is short and i'm technically still young and i dunno alot of things...
i guess i'll haf to learn thru experience...
if i think i'm going thru hell right now... then i'm wrong for hell is something far worst...
wad ever i go thru i haf to make sure i survive thru it...
no one but myself can save myself...
if i cant help myself then i dun deserve any help from anyone..
if i cant control myself... then i'm really useless...
if i hate being alone or lonely then i;m not independent enuff...
so everything starts wif me...
no matter how i hate something... or how i loved something...
i haf to learn to overcome everything...
ya noe theres jus really too many things in my mind that i wanna say... but i guess its juz all pointless crapping...
shall not say no further...

its the start of the year... and well its about time i shed my old self and change for a new self...
somethings gone, can never be found again... so treasure wad u haf now... and make sure ya never let it go..

hmmm some self note
certain things to work on...
lower body workout...seriously got to work on it...
cardio...
beside that... PLESE REMEMBER TO STUDY FOR LAB TEST...

oh that reminds me...
something i learn from my martial arts...
meditation...
though its may look useless...
it actuclly helps calm the mind...
something i forgot...
well beside that it works on ur qi...and well technically ur core...
so like i once tell myself...
i haf to cultivate the mind body and soul...
mind being state of mind and of coz my studies...
body being my physical self...the body has no limits if u believe in it...(see nv sleep for days and i'm still alive and active...)
and soul... well thats something i haben found yet...use to think hmmm gaming cultivate the soul but thats crap...

okok enuff of crapping... see from a short day become a damn long post...
anyway...
some things i'm really unhappy about... but i shall not write anyhere...
i dun wanna offend anyone...
shall juz keep it all to my dark side of myself =P

slp tight and take care ya all...
love ya all...
william

learn to love urself so others can love u...well loving myself is challenging enuff... LOL
well another things to add...really misses some of my frens already....some whos been working and some whos been studying... well noe that i always remember ya all ya =)

11:02 AM