-i'm.SO.miss-understood. -shikayeproductions.

Sigh....
navigations are the words.
This is my own space to let it out. especially when theres no one to talk to that true understands or try to understand me.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

update....17th feburary...

well more like update on wad happen yesterday ?
hmmm well yesterday started off pretty low... hmmm once again.. slp really really late and woke up really really late...
went down to my bros place.. attend his family de party =)
it was rather nice i would say, food, drink and it was really nice to see everyone
we played games, ate and talk...
then slowly they all started going home.. in the end i decided to stay there for the night...
well some things surprisingly happened.. sms my fren then next moment she invited me over her place for dinner... well it was rather surprising... i mean out of the blue.. till now i dunno why..
hmm but sadly i couldn't juz leave my bro.. =) had to turn her down..feel kinda bad though...

well that night i also talked to my dear fren.. well.. from juz simple talk become like me whinning bout my miserable life... haiz.. maybe i shld haf juz kept my tots to myself? i mean it aint nice to everytime talk to people and in the end i'm like talking all about me...
but still really appreciate my fren hearing me out... ya noe, i'm really glad ya came that time.. its really a blessing to haf noe ya.

well after that i kinda stayed up and watch a movie wif my bro then went to bed..
was talking to him bout some thing.. again.. he fell asleep..
well oh well cant blame him.. being tired and all... but i kinda really dun like it when people juz suddenly cut off or dose or or even ignore ya when ya talking... hmm its a sign.. i shld juz shut my gap....

well talking to my frens and all kinda makes me wonder some things...
gues i was never meant to be in all this things.. and well i'm meant to juz live off my life alone..
well things certainly look this way..
firstly i was never good enuff for anything, anyone, not even myself...
no matter how hard i try.. or did i?
was never good enuf.. even when people tell u ur good and all that.. mostly only said that to juz make u feel better but the fact is it could haf been better..
well i guess without the people around me i wouldn;t even got this far..
honestly i cant find a reason for me to live for myself.. i want to.. but then.. nvm its juz damn confusing..
used to do everything for her..
well give everything and all that.. but then unlike wad people tell me it didn;t turn out good..
hahaz crap.. here i go again.. nvm i think ya all noe the story liao so zzz

theres juz so many things i want to noe i wan to understand... why...

i shld juz throw all this aside for now...
hmmm even after i graduate.. i'd probably live my life in solitary out to sea and back and over and over again..
well lets hope it doesn;t let me down..
hopefully its like wad they say... else i really dunno wad am i living for already..

a point to take note to myself...
i shld watch myself more carefully.. and not influence the people around me with wad i think nd feel...its not fair to them... i shldn;t be spoiling their day and all...
i shld be wad i always haf been..cheerful and positiive no matter wad i feel and wad i am going thru...at all time..

zz dun feel like eating dinner...
guess i'll log here...
looking forward to tml.. it will be a brighter day...or will it?

logging
william...

next time round ya wont see me like that le i give u my word...
=D smile always..

oh i almost forgot.. in a few hours it would be my dear fren de birthday.. looking forward ya.. heres a very happy birthday to u in advance.. and juz to let u noe i got ur prezzie all prepared le.. hope u will like it...

2:52 AM