-i'm.SO.miss-understood. -shikayeproductions.
Sigh....
navigations are the words.
This is my own space to let it out. especially when theres no one to talk to that true understands or try to understand me.
+ Cheng Wee Chuan William
+ Yu Neng Primary School
+ Bedok South Secondary School
+ Ngee Ann Polytechnic
+ Republic of Singapore Navy
+ zazooosg@hotmail.com
+ 08/10/1989
+ Libra
Monday, July 21, 2008
hihi...
update again...
well today woke up weather quite cold...
so dun catch a cold ya u people =P
had a half a pack of milk for breakfast...
the other half for snack..
almonds for lunch with water...
zzz kinda sian....
anyway.. was reading sch email...
holy crap..
presentation i'm the last person on my panel...
zzz 4pm.. the only one at 4 pm...
crap...
looks like by this week or next i need to get an adaptor for my laptop
oh well i'll need to do some stunt to get the lecturers attention especially when i'm the last person..
sianz....
i also saw another mail asking me to provide name and contact number and student number..
the sch is forming a parade contingent for national day celebration zzz
well half of me wans to go half doesn't wan becoz its been so long...
tht kinda brings back some good memories and sad ones too hahaz
regreted not continueing..
hahaz
nvm...
while surfing the net came across a RSAF website dedicated to singapore rapier, 165 SADA.
hahaz to my surprise i saw my dad picture in them.. hahaz...
well he was quite fat then.. 100 over kilo..
hahaz now 70 over..
wow
=P if he can drop his weight so can i hahaha
hmm haiz.. shit always happen...
sianz...
sometimes juz get so sick of things..
logging william
8:31 PM
Sunday, July 20, 2008
seems like alot of people wans me to update =P
hahaz i'm honored..
actuclly i did update but then decided not to post them in the end...
well a little bit about lately...
honestly physically i;m doing pretty well...
currently working out really hard.. i wanna lose more weight...
well strength wise been gaining pretty constantly...
cardio wise and lower body strnegth is still lacking
been hanging out with frens and all...
trying to be on the positive side =)..
mood wise, been rather okie i guess...
some times do blow up all of the sudden...
although i still feel something missing...
like i'm lacking sumtin..
abit purposeless feeling..
and kinda feeling introvert..
like i dun really wanna talk to anyone kinda feeling.. or the no one really bothers feeling so why shld i bother kinda feeling...
well nothing wrong being quiet...
i juz wanna do well in the things i do...
and leave the rest...
i do however still care bout the people close to me...
i worry bout them... even though i noe they are old enuff to look after themself...
its like i really dun wan any bad things to happen to them...
maybe i;m beginning to be paranoid...
=P its somewhat disappoint when ya found out that people ya care about dun even bother bout ya... bout the things ya both been thru...
am i the only one who actuclly treasure the past? hmm well i guess i cant jump to that conclusion...juz becoz afew people...
talking bout frens... lately been worried bout a fren of mine...
constant headache and all...
well get well soon and take care alrite...
shes a really nice person and i wont wan any bad things to happen to her...
wont wan another repeat of wad happen back in year 1..where a happy cheerful person turn into someone who really sad and all that...
hahaz well i noe shes old enuff to look after herself... but still i worry hahaz...
besides that.. some others also sometimes disappoint and upsets me...
oh well... honestly i dunc are anymore.. ya all can think wadever u wan of me...
like as if u noe me... but honestly 3/4 of ya dun even noe me...
i would say only a handful who noes a little more about me...
i mean like even i dun noe myself....
zzz *calms down*
to my dear fren... sry haben contact ya lately..
hope u are well... i noe a few more weeks u'l be back in sg... i cant wait hahaz...
hmmm some change i notice in myself...
i cut down alot of alcahol, i eat more healthly.. work out more often...
i'm abit too tired to care about alot of things around me...
funny how things can still get to me when i dun even care anymore...
i guess i'm a magnet for crap in life hahaz...
that reminds me today.. this idiot at harbour front really spoiled my mood.. early morning..
i was at cheers.. he queue behind... getitng annoyed and all that pushing me and keep commenting the cashier so slow...
kaoz! if ur so fast go do it urself idiot!! pushing and getting annoyed wont get u anywhere...
i juz stared down at this pityful middle age man whos size looks rather puny...
dun play punk when u urself noe u cant handle it...
he stared at me... i juz said nothing...
honestly i think everyone is annoyed of him..
i pity him... growing so old le still liddat.. childish... brainless and pathetic..
well i comment these becoz i'm prejudice against him? i dun like him... case close...
when i take bus also liddat.. push push...
haiz sg people no wonder cant stand out from the rest of the world...
coz they really sometime too petty in the head...
nvm.. talking further juz spoils my mood further...
i asked myself wad is my puspose in life..
wad do i wanna do..
honestly the things i wanted nv came true...
the things i didn;t expect always happen...
well i think even though at the age of 18 i look at like as an 80 year old marathorn or shorter..
i'm born into this world destined to die..
i ask myself wad can i do out of this stretch of life..
and i cant think of anything...
i used to want to become successful and haf a really loving wife and kids... and all that..
but wad is being successful? it varies with different people...
loving wife.. hmmm well at age 19 i had one terrible r/s and single all the way...
kinda makes me doubt if thats ever gonna happen.. but who noes...
kids.. i love kids... but thats way int he future...
well i think at the moment.. i juz wan to be the best i can be in everything...
or simply put my impossible goal is to be perfect...
in all aspect...
hmm i think i'll end here...
its long enuff for an update after so long...
logging..
william...
7:29 PM
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
hey all,
back to update a little bit since i;m kinda free at the moment...
well at the moment, feeling abit weird, resume taking the supplement i used to take last time after a long break in between.
and well initial feelings were, heartrate increase and stuff.. pretty normal..
i did however intend to increase the dosage from 2 a day to 4 a day..
still below the direction given, and way below the amount that will kill ya..
and NO i;m not taking steroids..
well other than that been trying to improve my physique, kinda demoralising to see no result...
the scale dun move...
and lately a few update on my personal side,
i kinda left my cca partly due to my attachment, and partly other reasons.
been doing my own training. i wonder how much i can excel.
been wanting to pick up other martial art but haben really picked up any.. cant find one that meets my personal requirement.
well i noe i noe fighting is not good and all..
but its my interest my passion..
i dun fight outside at all, but i enjoy learning them..
training hard for them..
8:13 PM